"The Creaking Machinery of Humanity"

In the 80's I discovered Hayduke. Twenty years later I discovered Skink. Edward Abbey invented his crazy ex-Nam vet to wreck havoc on the industrial tourism of the southwest. Carl Hiaason invented his crazy ex-Nam vet to wreck havoc on the greedy scum and idiotic tourists of south Florida.

Hayduke is a long-haired and scraggly recluse who feared no one and believed his vigilante justice needed no defense. Skink is the long-haired and scraggly ex-governor of Florida, who disgusted at dealing with the corrupt politicians and crooked developers, disappears into the Everglades, living largely off road-kill, and living a morally correct life delivering his own brand of vigilante justice.

I've missed Hayduke, and in trying to keep him in my consciousness I have reread The Monkey Wrench Gang a couple of times. Thank god Carl Hiaason has given us another environmental maniac. Hiaason introduces us to Skink in Double Whammy, but the former governor is arguably at his comic best in Stormy Weather, a satirical look at the aftermath of Hurricane Andrew.

Towards the resolution of the novel we hear Augustine quote from the book The Tropic of Cancer. Although the words are originally Henry Miller's, Augustine is reading from a book in which Skink has underlined the passage:

"Today I am proud to say that I am inhuman, that I belong not to men and governments, that I have nothing to do with creeds and principles. I have nothing to do with the creaking machinery of humanity--I belong to the earth!"

For those of us who love Hayduke, could not these be his words? For those of us who know Skink could there be a better description? The ex-governor is a one-eyed, Moody Blues singing, toad smoking, possum-eating, hurricane loving environmental wacko living passionately among the alligators, rodents, and mosquitoes of his Crocodile Lakes camp.

I am certain Edward Abbey would have been very proud of the moment in Sick Puppy when the former ethical governor Skink pulls down the pants of the current corrupt governor Dick Artemus and carves the word "SHAME" across his butt using only a buzzard beak. Oh Cactus Ed...it is a beautiful moment, one we would have expected and understood from you. Yes, I certainly still want Hayduke around, but Skink is a pretty darn good substitute, and one that helps us once again relish in the magnificence of a fictional anarchist.